If Your Child Is Spicealot Chili 🌶️🔴…

How Can You Support Them and Understand the Care Behind Their Outbursts?

👀 You might notice situations like these:

When your child feels treated unfairly or misunderstood, they react instantly—shouting, yelling, slamming the table

They often say things like: "It’s not like that!" or "Why won’t you listen to me!"

When they fail or are criticized, they get overwhelmed easily—leading to sudden tears or bursts of anger

They struggle to clearly express what they want, so they use fire to communicate instead

These are typical traits of Spicealot Chili–type children 🌶️🔴:

They care a lot inside—but don’t yet know how to organize their emotions, so they "explode" to protect themselves.

🧠 What They Might Be Thinking Inside:

"I don’t want to make people angry—I just don’t want to be ignored."

"I’m mad because I care what you think of me."

"I don’t want to lose, but I don’t know how to express that I need understanding."

"When no one seems to understand me, getting mad is the only way I can protect myself."

✅ So How Can You Gently and Powerfully Support Them?

1️⃣ Acknowledge Their Emotions Instead of Immediately Scolding the Behavior

Don’t begin with:

"You’re being so rude!"

"Why are you angry? There’s nothing to be mad about!"

Try instead:

"I can see you’re really angry—something important must’ve gone wrong for you."

"It’s okay to feel angry—I want to hear what you’re really trying to say."

✅ Let them know: Your emotions are allowed, instead of just hearing "Be quiet!"

2️⃣ Help Them Turn the Fire Into Words

Guide them with questions like:

"What’s upsetting you the most?"

"How do you want people to treat you?"

"Which part made you feel the most uncomfortable inside?"

✅ Don’t tell them not to be angry—help them translate that anger into words.

3️⃣ Create a 'Safe Outburst Zone'

For example:

When emotions run high, say: "Do you want to go to the feelings corner to take a moment?"

Set up a space where they can express feelings freely without hurting anyone

✅ Teach them: "Emotions can be intense, but the way we express them can still be safe."

4️⃣ Gently Process Emotions Together Afterwards

When they’ve calmed down, ask softly:

"That must’ve felt really tough earlier—can you tell me how your heart felt?"

"Let’s think together: how can we express these feelings next time without having to explode?"

✅ Don’t criticize—be the one who helps them learn to express themselves more maturely.

5️⃣ Remember: Fiery Kids Have Deep Passion and a Strong Sense of Justice

If you can see it this way:

Their intensity = they value themselves, others, and fairness

Their sensitivity = they have huge potential to protect and to love

✅ Walk with them as they learn to turn their fire into the power to protect the world.

🔴 What Spicealot Chili–Type Kids Wish You Knew:

"I’m not bad—I just care too much."

"It’s not that I don’t love you—I just don’t know how to express it better."

"If you’re not afraid of my outbursts, I’ll slowly learn to speak with more gentleness."

💬 You Can Say to Them:

"I see you really care about what you want to say—I really want to listen to you clearly."

"You’re allowed to be angry, and we’ll learn together how to be powerful and protective."

"Whether you’re angry or not—I’ll always be here with you."