If my parents are Flamey the Fire 🔥… how can I cherish and care for them?
👀 You might notice these everyday moments:
- Mom keeps asking: "Did you sleep enough? Are you hungry?" But when you ask her back, she always replies: "I'm fine, don't worry about me~"
- Dad rarely says "I love you", but he quietly prepares everything you need — sometimes even before you ask
- They always worry about whether you're too tired or too busy, but never talk about their own exhaustion
- When there's conflict, they won't yell — just softly say, "I just don't want you to be upset."
If that sounds like your parents, they might just be… Flamey-type parents 🔥
🧠 What they might be thinking inside:
“I don't need to say much. If they're happy, I'm happy.”
“I should be a good parent, so I can't have too many emotions.”
“I don't want to trouble them — they should just focus on their own lives.”
“I just want to quietly stay by their side, not expecting to be remembered.”
They turn all their love into actions — they don't talk, don't cry,
they just stay — always there.
🧭 So how can I respond to their gentleness?
1️⃣ Instead of just saying "I know," say "I saw what you did"
👵: "I did your laundry — don't worry about me, go study~"
👦: "I know…" 👉 (too simple)
🧑🎓 Try this instead:
"I saw you got everything ready early today — thank you so much.
It really makes me feel safe."
✅ What Flamey-type parents want most isn't repayment, but to be seen.
2️⃣ Don't wait for them to speak up — ask first: "Were you happy today?"
Flamey parents aren't used to talking about themselves, but your care can slowly open them up:
- "I've been talking a lot about myself — what about you? Anything nice happen today?"
- "You've been taking care of me so much lately. Has anyone been taking care of you?"
✅ Don't assume they "don't need it" — your proactive care means the world to them.
3️⃣ When they say "it doesn't matter", don't drop it — say: "You have needs too"
👨: "No need to talk about me, I'm fine."
You could say:
"I know you don't like talking about it, but I want to know if you're happy — because you matter to me too."
✅ Flamey parents need you to tell them — gently but firmly — "You also have the right to express yourself."
4️⃣ Respond to their warmth with real action
They express love through doing — and so can you:
- Cook a meal for them or buy their favorite snack.
- Write a tiny post-it note: "Today, let me take care of you 💛"
- Take the initiative to do something they always do but never mention — like hanging clothes, folding laundry, or taking out the trash.
✅ Flamey parents find comfort in these "silent responses".
5️⃣ Remind them: "You don't have to shine all the time — it's okay to rest."
- "You don't have to always be doing things for others. Just being you is already enough."
- "You're not lovable because you always care for others — you're lovable just by being yourself."
- "I want to be your emotional shelter, the way you've always been mine."
✅ Flamey types won't say they're tired — so your initiative is their biggest support.
🔥 What Flamey-type parents want you to know:
- "It's not that I don't need to be cared for — I'm just too used to not asking."
- "When you ask about me or care for me first — it makes me happy all day."
- "I didn't do all this for thanks. But if you remember it — I won't feel like my love is invisible."
💬 You can say to them:
- "You're always warming others. I want to give you a little flame back sometimes."
- "I know you've done so much to take care of me — but I want to take care of you too. You don't have to carry everything alone."
- "Even if you stop glowing — I'll still be here beside you."